What Is Toxic Perfectionism?

Most people who are perfectionists can always expect higher performance from themselves and their surroundings. Often these are unrealistic there are expectations.

While a high level of perfectionism brings success to the person in business life, it reaches an excessive, i.e. toxic dimension, damage can give. Because for these people, it is no longer just to make something perfect, but perfectionism itself can become a goal. Then let’s take a look at the characteristics of these people.

Toxic perfectionism causes one’s goals to be determined by external circumstances.

According to a long-term study by Canadian psychologists, perfectionism is healthy when one sets realistic goals that one can achieve, is enthusiastic about self-improvement, and competes with peers in a way that is not excessive. In other words, this situation is healthier, in a community, one’s relationship with others. solution-oriented communication can cause.

But when things go wrong, it has negative consequences. How Does? A study at the University of Bath in England found that toxic perfectionism has risen enough to officially become a fashion. Even researchers, this rise, with social media suggests it may be related. Because there, people can make an effort to show their lives different and more beautiful than they are.

This means watching a life that others think is more perfect than they are on a digital screen 24/7. ‘be the best’ causes them to feel pressure. In fact, researchers say this type of mindset can lead to depression, extreme anxiety and suicide.

People suffering from this condition can feel the pressure and anxiety of everything that is happening in the external environment. Actually, it’s kind of; every person, event, situation and object can be enough to motivate them to do better. Because in the subconscious of these individuals, “what if I fail”, “what if I fail” form of thought patterns. Likewise, we can say that behind this fear of inadequacy and failure, there is a secret fear of rejection that no one knows about.

These people also do not have realistic thoughts and goals about life. You ask why? Because they live not for themselves, but to get the “perfect image” in the eyes of others. We can say that this allows them to build an identity based on the tastes and wishes of others, often compromising their personalities and characters. In short, there is a false belief underlying this behavior; it is that these people believe that every word, behavior and action in life will/should be perfect.

The most striking feature of these people is that they are extremely sensitive and intolerant to criticism.

These people often blame their faults on others, not their own. as if missing can detect. In other words, instead of accepting the aspects that they lack and need to improve, they reflect this to the other person as if it is their inadequacy. These people may find it difficult to manage both their private and business relationships. Once the most important; Since these individuals do not accept criticism in any way, they may perceive the criticism of others as a threat. Thus, those people can become potential enemies in their eyes.

These people can never come to negativity. For this reason, they are able to make a superhuman effort to obtain a positive result from any subject. In addition, the approval of their work by the external environment makes them feel that they are on the right track. Otherwise, when they don’t get any reaction from the outside, they can perform more and try to attract more people. This effort, as we mentioned above, is an intense struggle in their inner world. sense of inadequacy due to their struggle.

If you set unattainable goals, it won’t be hard to get caught up in the self-fulfilling prophecy.

A movie where you can find an example of toxic perfectionism: Black Swan

As a matter of fact, these people are so afraid of failing that they set goals for themselves that they can’t reach, and confirm their fears. This situation causes people to feel exhausted and tired after a while. Working hard to get a positive result requires a pause once in a while because then it will work again. energy so you can find it yourself.

However, since individuals suffering from this problem work without a break, their energy runs out after a while and it is inevitable that they will fail. These people ‘all or nothing’ They also need to learn to abandon their logic and look at life from a moderate-measured line sometimes.

In addition, these individuals cannot see the gray windows of life because they have some toxic characteristics, such as overgeneralizing events. Thus, these people can be called as “solid and unchanging” people by their social environment. These characteristics can cause them to have arguments in their dialogues with others while socializing and cause them to become lonely. According to psychologists, these people have a awareness they need to win.

Experts say that even if they do not achieve great success in the work they do, they still need to know how to appreciate themselves. In addition, according to therapists, they lower their expectations from themselves and from life, from stress, sadness and worry It can help them get away. Therefore, we can say that it is beneficial for these people to receive regular psychological therapy.