I thought John Torode was arrogant when we met – but he’s so much less brash since we married, says Lisa Faulkner

WHILE for most women, working with their partner is their idea of hell, it is where  Lisa Faulkner is at her happiest.

Even if her husband – straight-talking MasterChef judge John Torode – prefers she didn’t leave chaos in her wake. “He’s the tidy one. I’m the messy one,” she says.

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The couple, who got married in 2019, enjoy mixing business and pleasure – which is a good job, considering they’re on to series seven of their much-loved ITV show John & Lisa’s Weekend Kitchen.

“We don’t spend that much time with each other,” Lisa, 50, explains. “So to get to film together is a joy. We film, come home, sleep then film again. It’s lovely.”

But chefs are famous for their tempers rising as quickly as the kitchen temperatures around them, so how do she and John, 57, avoid falling out?

“There are a few little spats of tiredness or us both wanting something to be good,” she explains. “He’ll say: ‘Why are you looking at that?’ And I’ll say: ‘You’ve done big chunks. I didn’t want big chunks.’ It’s a bit like siblings, you have a bit of a [row] and then you’re fine. It helps I do really like him. I find that’s very good for a marriage – to like the other person,” she laughs.

The pair met back in 2010 when Lisa was a contestant on Celebrity MasterChef while John was on the judging panel alongside Gregg Wallace.

They were both still married to their former partners at the time, and after Lisa won the show they formed a purely platonic friendship. Then Lisa’s marriage to Chris Coghill ended in 2011 while the chef split from wife Jess the same year. 

But it wasn’t until 2015 that they got together, after John wrote her a letter asking her out, which Lisa describes as “the loveliest thing”. They tied the knot in October 2019 in front of their friends and family at Aynhoe Park in Northamptonshire. 

But it clearly wasn’t love at first sight – the pair had actually met almost 20 years before, when Lisa appeared as a guest on This Morning, where John was cooking.

“He didn’t remember me at all. He used to say: ‘Oh, all right, yeah,’ like he didn’t believe me.

“And then he did an interview on This Morning where they showed the clip and he came home and said: ‘I did meet you!’ And I went: [rolling her eyes] ‘I know, I did tell you.’ 

‘Really arrogant’

“I remembered it so well. It’s really funny. He said he was nervous because it was his first time on telly. I thought he just seemed really arrogant.”

Lisa has had such a positive impact on John that pals think she has made the Aussie chef less arrogant.

She laughs: “I don’t know if arrogance is the right word because I find arrogance quite attractive. He is brash and he knows how good he is at certain things.

“But I think he has got less… aggressive, maybe. He’s definitely softened. I went to lunch the other day and somebody said: ‘Oh my gosh, you’ve completely turned him around. 

He was so moody on MasterChef. He was always so grumpy and he’s just lovely now.’ I went: ‘OK, I’ll take all the credit.’”

It’s clear from listening to Lisa talk about John how smitten she still is with him. She credits their romantic gestures for keeping their marriage rock solid.

“He’s very romantic. We both are. We look after each other. If he’s out before me in the morning, he’ll leave a cup with a teabag in by the kettle and a note saying: 

‘I love you’. I do the same – I put notes in his bag when he goes away. And he makes me the most amazing food. That’s so romantic.

“It’s the little things that are important – I love it when we cook for each other. Food is our thing, it’s how we show that we love each other.”

But there are downsides to dating a chef, especially on date night. “You go out for dinner and you have some lovely food and you think: ‘My husband can make this [better]’. [It’s the same with] actors: you watch something and think: ‘Why didn’t I go up for that part?’ It stops you from just enjoying shows.”

It’s the little things that are important – I love it when we cook for each other. Food is our thing, it’s how we show that we love each other.

Lisa has had a few things to teach her husband about food, not least about the delights of a McDonald’s brekky. “I can count the times he’s had McDonald’s. I made him have a breakfast once coming back from Australia. He asked me: ‘What are you going to get?’ He didn’t have a clue, whereas I know the whole menu!”

With her amazing figure and flawless skin, it’s clear Lisa doesn’t indulge in Maccy D’s too frequently. She looks much younger than 50 – although she’s no fan of ageing after hitting the half-century milestone in February. 

“I wasn’t looking forward to it,” Lisa says. “I hated turning 30, 40 and 50. I dreaded it. But actually my birthday was one of the loveliest days.

“We went to Soho Farmhouse with my family, the kids and all my closest friends. We laughed, ate great food and  suddenly I thought: ‘Oh, actually, it’s not too bad.’”

It’s not surprising that ageing is bittersweet for Lisa, after her mum died from cancer when she was six years younger than Lisa is now.

“I’m trying hard to embrace it and not become really anxious about birthdays. My mum died when she was 44, so I don’t know what she would have looked like at my age.

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“It’s a very strange thing to hit half a century. It gets you thinking, but the alternative [dying] is something so awful. There’s a part of me that thinks: ‘Embrace it.’ And as long as you are healthy and happy, that’s what’s important.”

While her cooking career is going from strength to strength, it’s easy to forget Lisa started out as an actress. Having previously starred in EastEnders, Brookside and Spooks, she is keen to return to acting, but it’s not an easy industry to age in. 

“I’m doing stuff. I’ve got a tiny part in a drama. It’s been so nice to act again – I love it as much as I love cooking. But the whole business is very difficult. There aren’t the parts [for older women]”, she says with a sigh.

“It is so sad because women over 50 watch television, but still we are playing facilitators. We’re somebody’s mum or a professional person that’s driving the story. 

‘It’s always a challenge’

“It should be that there are as many [lead] parts for women as men, but it isn’t the case. It’s very slowly getting better, but it’s so slow and it’s got to be addressed. We have to keep pushing and shouting and making our voices heard as women, because nobody else is going to help us.”

Luckily, Lisa has an amazing gang of girl friends – including Angela Griffin, Nicola Stephenson, Tamzin Outhwaite and Amanda Holden – who do shout about their successes.

“We do [discuss it]. If somebody’s Instagramming about something, we will absolutely push it as well. All of us are in that position where we’re still working, not as much as we would always want. We are very, very lucky to be in that percentage of working actors. 

“Amanda is a great actress. It’s sad because you get pigeonholed. In America you can host a show and be an actress. Whereas, it’s very snobby in the UK and it’s very much: ‘Well, if you’re an actress, then just be an actress.’

“And even in that, if you do a soap then you can’t do serious drama. If you are in show business, you can do a lot of things. I’m going to keep putting myself out there and keep going up for auditions. Even if it’s for one scene, I’ll keep going for them.”

As well as rooting for each other career-wise, Lisa is grateful she had her girls, particularly Lisa Snowdon, to help her through the menopause.

She says: “I adore Lisa [for speaking out about the subject]. I hope there will come a time where it’s a given that menopause is part of a woman’s life. For me, it doesn’t seem like a massive thing [to take HRT]. I need my hormones regulating so I don’t have brain fog, I can sleep and not feel really anxious. 

“I hope there will come a time when women realise it’s not the end of your life. You’re not a shrivelled-up old person that doesn’t matter any more.  More than anything else, it’s that anxiety and a loss of feeling like yourself, which is a really scary thing.

“It’s about taking control of that and saying: ‘Something is not right. I need to balance out my hormones’ and not feel embarrassed or shamed. 

The key is to have as open a relationship as you can and to talk about things that you may not have thought you would have with your kids. We talk about most things.

“Let’s make sure that any woman can get HRT and that it is looked upon in the workplace as: ‘She’s fine, but just needs a bit of support.’”

Lisa is equally supportive as a parent. She and John have had the challenge of blending their families, too. The actress has daughter 

Billie, 16, with her ex-husband Chris, while John has four children – Lulu, 16 and Jonah, 18, with ex wife Jessica, and Casper and Marselle, who are in their 20s, from another relationship. The secret of their success is openness.

Lisa says: “It’s always a challenge. But we’re lucky that we have great kids. It’s normal in the way that everyone has their ups and downs and their roles to play.

“Teenagers are interesting. [Growing up now] is very different. I think the key is to have as open a relationship as you can and to talk about things that you may not have thought you would have with your kids. We talk about most things.”

Lisa never shied away from being open about her struggle to become a mother. After three failed rounds of IVF, she adopted Billie in 2008 and wrote a book in 2019 called Meant To Be about infertility and adoption.

“It’s really difficult,” she explains, looking back on that time. “We are all on this rollercoaster of trying to meet someone, then it’s: ‘Are you getting married?’ ‘Are you having babies?’ Then you have a baby and it’s: ‘Are you having another one?’ 

“We’re constantly grappling for something else, but when it doesn’t happen like it’s meant to, it’s really hard. Your friends are all doing the same thing at the same time. Suddenly you’re the only person in a sea of 20 other people that [isn’t] pregnant… I think it stays with you for a very, very long time. 

“I met somebody yesterday who said: ‘A lot of my friends follow you because of the IVF thing. Your book was the first time someone spoke to me.’

“I was so happy they found solace from me being honest that IVF is really hard. It isn’t really talked about and it can really mess with you. If I meet somebody, I never ask: ‘Do you have kids?’” 

She may not look 50, but it seems Lisa certainly has life sussed.  

• Watch John & Lisa’s Weekend Kitchen, Saturday September 17, 11.40am, ITV.