Domestic violence has devastating effects on families, as illustrated by two sons who recounted their traumatic experiences during their father’s court hearing. Convicted of assault and threats, the father created a legacy of fear, with incidents of violence impacting his family for nearly two decades. The mother expressed the struggle of seeking justice while the sons vowed to break free from their father’s cycle of violence. Sentencing recommendations varied, highlighting the complexities of accountability and rehabilitation.
Impact of Domestic Violence on Families
“Everything I know about you is violence. Each day is filled with chaos.” These powerful words were spoken by two sons of an abusive father during a court hearing on Friday, where they shared the profound effects of their father’s actions on their lives. The prosecution and defense presented starkly contrasting sentences for the convicted individual.
In heart-wrenching letters read by their mother, the teenagers bravely described the terror they endured at the hands of their father, who unleashed his anger over trivial matters, including their hockey performances. “I often felt unworthy of love, believing I could never do anything right because you constantly told me I was worthless,” one son wrote, expressing that no words could adequately capture the pain he experienced.
A Legacy of Fear and Trauma
The 40-year-old man, whose identity is protected to shield the victims, was convicted in May of assault and threats against his former partner and three of their four children. This cycle of violence persisted for nearly two decades, during which the mother suffered severe abuse, including an incident where she lost consciousness from a blow. “I feared I had killed you,” the father chillingly remarked after a violent episode.
In this family, hockey—typically a sport that fosters connection and joy—became a source of dread for the children. “It’s over, hockey. He’s going to get a beating in the car,” the father would threaten, instilling fear in his sons. On another occasion, he violently grabbed his 8-year-old son by the throat after a disappointing game.
“The thought of leaving the locker room and getting into the car filled me with terror, especially when I witnessed your outbursts in the stands,” one of the teenagers recounted in his letter during the sentencing remarks for his father, whom he lived in constant fear of. “I saw you harm my mom and those I care about. I was scared.”
The man’s ex-partner also addressed the court, reflecting on the five years since her initial complaint as a “destructive” struggle, compounded by the fact that he never took responsibility for his actions, leading to a challenging trial process.
However, with the conviction now in place, she and her children are on the path to liberation from the fear that has haunted them. “I am proud, strong, and you will never take that away from me,” she declared to her former partner.
“You should have offered me kindness and love, but all you gave me was violence. I fear becoming like you,” one son stated, affirming his commitment to making his own choices, separate from his father’s influence. “And you will never be part of them.”
During Friday’s proceedings, opposing recommendations for sentencing were presented to Judge Stéphane Poulin. The defense attorney requested a conditional discharge, arguing that the man should not have a criminal record to maintain his ability to work in healthcare. “Society needs men like him,” claimed Me Susan Corriveau, citing her client’s assertion of personal change.
In contrast, prosecutor Me Louis Durand-Bluteau advocated for a prison sentence of four and a half years, with additional observations to be submitted to the court at a later date due to time constraints.